Well, this is the second one that I have been to. I have done so many of her studies already and read her books and LOVE Travis Cotrell's praise and worship sooooo very much.
Her message of course was based off of her new book- So Long Insecurities. I have it and about 1/2 way through it. I would say this is nothing like I have ever read before from her. Totally different.
She has hit me right where I live in my "insecure" world. Most people that know me would have absolutely NO CLUE just how insecure I am. I knew it but had no idea it was as bad until I realize how much I was hiding and trying to pretend that I was something or someone else.
Beth said so much yesterday but it was not so much hearing what Beth had to say but what the Lord had to say to me. Some of which I would not share on this blog because somethings are personal.
At the same time- I KNOW (that I KNOW) I walked out of Cornerstone Baptist Church yesterday a Secure Woman in who I am in Christ.
It doesn't matter what size I am.
It doesn't matter if my hair is always right.
I can't put all my securities in people.
I can't expect perfection from people.
I can't expect non-Christians to behave like Christians.
I will not chose to be insecure.
This was a totally knew thought in this head of mine. Being insecure is a choice!!?? Think about it. You and I chose to be insecure about people, actions, appearance, thoughts. If I chose to allow my thoughts to take over who I am, I would not be able to leave the house. I am choosing to be a secure woman in Christ. I am choosing to live like the beloved child that I am.
My favorite illustration that she gave yesterday- She talked about what it says over in Hebrews about being sprinkled and made clean, I believe it is in chapter 10. She took us back to Genesis where it talks about Adam and Eve making the choice to eat the apple and being banned from the garden and the thorns that would now be on the earth. She brought us forward to the Cross. Jesus on the cross with the crown of thorns and how that represented the sin being pressed in on Him and the blood that was being sprinkled on those at the foot of the cross, me and you. To be standing at the foot of the cross, in order for that sprinkle of blood to hit you heart, you have to literally look up at Him, face to face, and throw your head back and that sprinkle hits your chest, your heart. WOW!!!!
I am such a visual person and for me, this was the thing that stuck out to me so much. To understand that I am His beloved child and for me to walk around be so totally insecure is just wrong.
The hubby got a new truck this weekend. It has the most cool and awesome radio/GPS/DVD/CD player gadget in it. Of course, we have no clue how it all works but we are working on it. We hoped in the car last night and I went to work on it trying to figure it out. He typically listens to a local radio station and I listen to KLove. I don't hardly EVER change my radio station. I put in KLove and he said"Just leave it there" I was so excited. He hasn't changed it yet. Maybe he won't. Now as silly as it is, I had been feeling insecure about changing the station in his car. Last night, there was almost a sense of boldness and confidence in it. Yes it is a small thing. Yes, for some it probably seems really silly but for me it was a big thing. I care greatly about what Kaleb listens to in the car and at home. I know that when I am in the car, what I listen to gets stuck in my head. I wake up thinking and "singing" it in my head. Praise Him that this morning I woke up singing "Do It Lord" by Travis. It's little steps but they have changed me. I am choosing to behave like the Beloved Child of His that I am. I am FORGIVEN. I am REDEEMED. I AM SECURE!!!!!! I am a CONFIDENT SECURE WOMAN!!!!!!
Many thanks to the women of Cornerstone that put the simulcast together. It was an event that I won't forget.
Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam