HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!

Happy

New

Year!!!!!!!!

It's

going

to

be

a

great

NEW

YEAR

in

2011!!!!!!!!!!

400th Post!!!!!!!!

I can not believe it. 
I am amazed and overwhelmed. 
I am shocked!!!!!!
I can't believe that this will be my 400th post.  I have been blogging long enough to have made 400 entries.  What in the world do you talk about to make 400 post?
You talk about...........
What the Lord is doing
Your children
Your husband
Your Work
Your passion
Your life
Your challenges
Your failures
Your wins
Your everything (not literally but you know what I mean).

I wanted to take a moment and just tell you THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH for sticking with me and coming back again and again to read.
For those of you that know me well, being a Doula is a passion of mine.  I have shared many stories, words of encouragement and other things that I have learned being a Doula. That will not change here on the blog BUT there is something VERY NEW and VERY EXCITING and today just seemed to be the day to reveal it OFFICIALLY!!!!!!  I chose to shift a lot of the "Birth-y" things to a new blog/website.  It is so much fun creating a new blog/website and choosing what you want to put on it, the colors, the information and all of little details. 
The new blog/website is Ready for the Crescendo of Birth and Beyond.  You can click here and go to the site.  Please go and check it out.  I would love to hear your input and thoughts.  I even set up different "pages" on the website. I felt very lead to do something a little different there.  I thought and prayed a lot over what the pages would hold.  I felt that because the Lord has continued to bless the blessing of Mothering The Mother ,  how could I not share about Him, especially to those who don't know Him.  It just seemed disobedient to NOT share. That is the title of one of the pages. "Where's my Peace?".  I can't tell you how excited I am.

Once again, to all of you who come and visit, read and share in the comments, I can't thank you enough.  2011 is going to be a GREAT year!!!!!!!!!! 

Thanks again!!!!!!!

Doula Mama Pam

BIG NEWS IS COMING WITH THE NEXT POST!!!!!!

Good day!!!!!!! It's cold outside. It's cold inside. Snow is still on the ground. It's melting and I have a real love-hate relationship with the snow.
I love it falling.
I love it on the ground.
I love it when it's smooth and no footprints.
I love it on the trees.
I hate it when it melts because it may not be back for a while.
I hate it when it makes black ice.
I hate it when it hangs around in the shade around your car and you pray you don't fall getting in or out.
See what I mean?

Did you have a good Christmas? We sure did. It was a little strange because Bo had to go to work about hour and half before the turkey was done and didn't come home until the next night. It was just strange but good. Kaleb has more than he knows what to do with. Kyle got money and he was happy. Amber is home from college so that was most important.

I put away the Christmas light background and the new background is out.
What do you think? I am signed up to run a race in February with Ashley. Neither have run in probably 6 weeks. Time to get busy. I'm going to the gym tonight and we will see what happens. It may kill me but I'm not willing to give up and say forget it.

Thinking about this past year and the year to come.
What parts do I wish I could forget?
What parts do I treasure?
What parts do I remember the most?
There would be books to write. Most important is the fact that the Lord blessed me so very richly and for that I forever truly thankful. This coming year holds some new adventures. Of which I will share in the next BIG NEWS post!!! You do NOT want to miss it.!!!!!!!!

How was your Christmas?
Did you find a new favorite goodies to eat?
Remembering this year- what will you do different? What will you do the same?
Any new adventures for you this year? new goals?

Stay Tuned!!!!!!!
Doula Mama Pam

Merry Christmas

Wishing

you

and

your

family

a

VERY

MERRY

CHRISTMAS!!!!!!

2 post on one day??? What a shocker!!!!

Well, today has been interesting so far. We were running late this morning and my hubby tripped in Kaleb's room and out of Kaleb came..."Daddy, you fall down?". I am sure he will feel it in the morning but we could nothing but laugh at the moment. Stopped in at the gas station for a quick $10 (that doesn't buy much) so I could at least get to work. Working with an doctor (my Midwife) and get a migraine in the middle of the morning. What a day. What a time to get a massive headache.

Well, I was thinking last night while my oldest had gone to pickup his girlfriends present and hubby was snoozing in the recliner and little one laying in my lap while we watched some show about scary water creatures (he was all into it), what about Christmas?
Have I totally missed it this year?
Have I totally been so wrapped up in this and that that I have forgotten?
What Christmas songs have I been singing or should I say NOT singing?
What baking have I done?
Am I excited about it?
Do I just want it to be over so I can clean up my house?

I have really struggled this year with just being excited and "in the holiday spirit". I think while sitting last night I realized why.
BUSY!
We have been so busy that I missed it.
I missed reserving a Saturday to destroy the kitchen while baking.
I missed going out and getting little Christmas ornaments for everyone.
We made the decision between Bo and I that we would not exchange this year and that has been a major change for me that I have really struggled with.
I don't even have anything wrapped yet because we are so busy.
Can you tell what my New Years Resolution is going to be?
I just need to stop.
I need to slow down and enjoy the holidays and the time together with family.

What about you?
Are you busy?
Have you been to the manger this year?
I will confess, I have not and I am headed there ASAP to get back on track!
Have you missed out on the meaning of Christmas because you are so busy?

It's time to refocus. It's time to go back to the manger and remember. It's time to remember that if we didn't have a manger, we wouldn't have a cross and there would be no relationship.

I'm praying that you have a wonderful day. Refocus and remember!!!!!

Laboring with You,
Doula Mama Pam

A New Christmas Carol

I heard Ann sing this at church. Listen to the words. Can you testify to it?

You Will Not Believe What I Did!!!!!!

If you know me at all or know anything about you, You should know that I do not eat red meat. A group of great friends, several years back, decided to go vegetarian. Of course that was kind of difficult at the time because everyone in the house loved MEAT!!! Well, we did it for a time and then we added back in chicken and fish. Eventually, we stopped and the problem was that I never went back to the red meat. I had taken myself off of it for such a time that when I tried, I couldn't do it. It killed my stomach. I couldn't stand to see it, smell it and heaven forbid I try to touch it to prepare it.
Over the years I have tried it every now and then and the same thing....my stomach just kills me afterwards. We eat A LOT of turkey burgers in our house. My oldest, Kyle, will NOT eat a turkey burger. So, this past Sunday, I made a run with the hubby to the grocery store to pick up a few things. I picked him up a pack of hamburgers. Real Red Meat in my refrigerator. You would have thought I had bought gold. I am not sure who was more excited, my husband or Kyle.
Last night, I had a meeting with a potential client so we got home late. We walked in the door to the smell of burgers being cooked on the stove by none other than Chef Kyle. He was so very excited. He even bought "real cheese" and "real buns" for the "real hamburgers". I have to admit, they did smell good. Of course Bo LOVED the smell. I told him that I would eat 1/2 of a burger. That was all I could do because I didn't want my stomach to be totally messed up. Kyle downed his and I think he and Bo were both in heaven!!!! I will admit, they were good. He had done a fantastic job.
So all of that being said....yes, I ate red meat last night and believe it or not.....my stomach is just fine. Thank you Kyle for a great dinner. You did a great job.!!!!!!!!

Doula Mama Pam

WOW!!!!! What a week!!!!!!

What a week. There are no words to describe the week it has been and this week is more of the busy-time of the year.
Tuesday night I got a phone call from a "Mom" that I was working with. She and her husband are just awesome. They were going to try some natural induction methods. No more calls the rest of the night. Then Wednesday night I got a call that she maybe in some real labor. I grabbed my stuff and out the door. Nope, false alarm. I went home and so did she. Rest and just wait.
My Dad came into town and was helping my brother move. We all went out to dinner on Thursday evening to celebrate that he was now a homeowner. While at dinner the phone rang and I missed the call. We came home and checked the phone and realized I had missed it. I don't think I ever changed so fast in my life. Off to the hospital I went.
All is GREAT!!!!! An awesome family has been born. Can't wait for my postpartum visit later on this week. It's going to be great. Of course, if they give permission, I will share their story.

Saturday was a busy day, cleaning, shopping, going here and there. I met with a new possible client and had a delightful time. I received an e-mail later that they had chosen me to be their Doula. I was so excited. They are just an awesome couple. I can't wait.

Sunday was fabulous!!!! We taught our little one's in Sunday School and then off to lunch with some great friends. We have decided to do Kid-Swap for dinner/date nights once a month. Ashley and I work together so we can keep track. I am not sure who is more excited, me or her. It's going to be awesome!!!!!!!!! We then went back to church for the Christmas Program. It was just amazing. They choir, the children, the soloist and the quartet. It was exactly what I needed.

Today is more just like it. Work, had a great meeting with Linda from Peaceful Beginnings and then more work and then off to meet another new client this evening. I can't wait!!!!! We have chatted before and talked on Facebook several times so we now get to meet each other face to face. Very exciting!!!!!!!!

I didn't realize it but my link to my other blog, "Doula Mama In The Kitchen"was missing with all of the recipes. I have re-posted it on the side if you would like to visit and become a "Follower". I would love to see you over there. Oh, and if you have something you would like to share, please send it and we will get it up!!!!!!!!!

Hope you have a great Monday and we will chat again tomorrow. So very excited. I have news to share!!!!!!!!!

Laboring and Celebrating Christmas With You,
Doula Mama Pam

It's Monday.......................

Well, I could sit here and whine. I mean REALLY whine about my weekend.
I could whine about
being sick all weekend,
having the aches so bad, that I thought I would cry if I moved
using a boat load of tissues
taking medicines that I don't like to take
drinking enough coffee and tea because it was the only thing that made my throat feel better
having a sick hubby that feel the same way I do.
having to come to work today and be 2 nurses short.

BUT I CHOOSE NOT TO!!!!!!
I choose rather to be as positive and thankful as possible for
-having medication to take
-being able to put up a Christmas Tree when the medicine kicked in
-watching Kaleb light up when the lights came on
-watching Kaleb rearrange the ornaments that are within reach that have a "hooker" on them.
-laughing every time he said that.
-that I have a job
-that they called a nurse from another office to help today
-that I have BSF this evening. Best part of a Monday

It's all about a choice.

On another topic, I have a friend that you know from previous post, Tara, also known as "Ta-Ta" from Kaleb's point of view. She lost her Father this past week and had his Celebration yesterday. We were unable to go because we were all sick. So she sent me a message on Face book and ask me to change her blog around a bit and update the background and stuff. Of course while praying for her yesterday morning I was just thanking the Lord that we have such a means of sharing and journaling on blogs and thought that she might need hers. It would be a good outlet of sorts over the coming weeks. He answered that prayer right away!!!!! I was so thankful. I had a blast changing it around this morning. Not sure if she has seen it yet or not or if she likes it. I hope so. This loss was a difficult loss, not just because it was her father but because of some other damage that had been done in the last years. Please just remember to be praying for her and her sweet family over the coming days. I am sure that she would covet your prayers.

Well, we really are short at work, so I had better get busy. A lot to do and very little time to do it in!!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Toy Packaging

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!

Sharing A Moment

Isaiah 25:1-5 The question was which of these characteristics has God shown you that you would share with your group. Of course, I had to journal. There was no option. So, here you go.....

God, you are my God and I will ever praise you.
You are perfect in every way.
Your faithfulness reaches to the Heavens
Your faithfulness has seen me through the good, the bad and the ugly.
Scripture says that You have been a refuge for the poor.
You continue to be a refuge for the poor.
The poor in spirit, the poor physically, emotionally and mentally.
You are THE safe place to go when there is no one who we can turn to.
Your scripture also states that You are a shelter from the storm.
You are the first refuge and shelter that we SHOULD see.
Shame on us for seeking shelter in human friends, well-meaning family, books etc.
YOU are the refuge of perfect peace and love.
You are the shade from the heat.
When things can get very heated, no matter who or what did it.
We can bring it to you and you can resolve it and heal us.
You are perfect-
IN EVERY WAY!!!!

Thank you for allowing me to share my moment.
Laboring and Journaling with You,
Doula Mama Pam

M.I.A and BLESSED!!!!!!!

Well, it has been a while and i confess that I took the easy way out and posted a video with a one line. That was a bit on the wimpy side but I have been so terribly swamped that I just couldn't sit down and make a post. There is so much I wish I even now had time to post.

First, if you are not part of BSF (Bible Study Fellowship), the only thing I can tell you is PLEASE find a class and jump in. This year has been just awesome. I have been challenged. I have been encouraged. I have been so hungry for His Word and just amazed to read and study a particular passage and then be in a conversation or a sermon and hear the same thing that I am studying or have heard in a lecture or somewhere else during that week or another week. Absolutely amazing. This past week we had the opportunity to "share" on one of the questions but of course, thanks to Peggy and Marsha, I could not just "share". I had to change it to a journaling moment. I will share it tomorrow on here by request of Peggy.

Second is something I have been trying and praying and struggling with. I have literally watched Him move mountains, change peoples minds and literally have to put His hand up in front of me and say "Wait- not yet". I once heard it said that we should not pray for patience because it is one of the Fruits of the Spirit and we already have it. We just have to learn how to use it and put it to practice. Does that make sense? It does for me. All of that being said, I am happy and VERY ECSTATIC to announce that Eagle Ob/Gyn (where I work) will be starting Group Prenatal Care in mid to late January. I had the "Final" meeting with our Supervising MD last night and answered questions and given the go-ahead for the First Group to get started. I can not tell you how much time and energy has been spent on doing my research and gathering information for the doctors and praying, and praying and praying and so wanting someone to understand how much this would benefit our patients. I was so excited, I didn't sleep much last night thinking about all the things that I needed to get done, wanted to do and so many other things This is a huge step for the practice, the doctors and myself. I believe with everything in me that this is about His timing and His only.

So, you may ask yourself.....What in the world is Group Prenatal Care? Well let me give you a quick run down and not bore you with the statistics etc.
Basically, a group of 4-8 women who all have similar due dates get together about once a month at their prenatal appointment and with the help of the Facilitator (that would be me) we will talk and learn about pregnancy, labor, birth, postpartum, and child care. We get to know each other, ask questions, go through a "work-book" of sorts, talk about what we are nervous about, and support one another. After this time, they go and have their one-on-one appt. with their doctor. All the appointments are scheduled pretty much for their entire pregnancy and they choose when they come for the visits. This has been found to have better out comes with pre-term labor and birth, more educated Moms and Dads, more empowered for the actual birth process and ready to bring their new bundle home. This is truly one of my passions. I am so very exited to be able to bring this to our practice and one of the only one's in our area that is doing it!!!!!!!

That is the start of much more to come. Stay tuned!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

New Song----LOVE IT!!!!

I have heard this song on the radio a million times. Have you ever had a day when you were just down? can't do anything right? everything you try fails? This song is just precious. Great reminder that He will always love you no matter what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


There is more to come...................

Day 17

Today I am "Thankful" for my work hours. I know this sounds really strange. I work typically from 8:30a-5p and only take 1/2 hour for lunch so I don't have to stay until 5:30p. This week is a little different because I am working with an MD so I am not leaving until 5:30p or later. So what is the point? My hubby and Little Man leave for work between 7:30a and 7:30a every morning. I have the perfect quiet time. I have a good 30 minutes for prayer-time, bible reading and communication with the Father. I just love it. I have thought on many occasions of starting my day at 8am at work so I can take a full hour for lunch but I keep going back to....then what about my quiet time and time with the Father. Not an option.

What about you? What are you Thankful for today???????

Laboring and being Thankful with You,
Doula Mama Pam

Day 16

Day 16- Car Seats......I know that a lot children don't like them. I am grateful for the fact that we have 1 truck and 1 car. We have a car seat in each car. Something very simple and something that we take for granted. I recently heard about a precious family here from another country. They had just had a baby at the hospital. They were ready to be discharged. NO CAR SEAT!!! They didn't understand because in the part of Africa that they are from, there is no need for one. This poor little baby stayed in the hospital for 4 days until the parents were able to get a car seat to bring their little baby home. Oh, how we take if for granted. How many have you gone through? Do you have one in your garage that you baby has outgrown? Find an organization, a friend, a church or someone or somewhere that can use it. Be thankful for that car seat in your car!!!!!!!!

Laboring and being Thankful,
Doula Mama Pam

No, I didn't fall of the face of the earth!!!!!

I am still here, believe it or not. So, I didn't get to post for the past few days. I just feel at times I have so much to share that I have to stop and really think through what I want to share. I had stopped with #9 so, let us get caught up today.

#10- BSF- Bible Study Fellowship- This is something I did a long time ago and loved it. Little did I know what a change that it would bring to my life. They were doing the Life of Moses that year. I went with every intention of staying and going all the way through with every year. Well, the Lord had other plans. I found out that my Teaching Leader, Hannah Thompson, would actually be traveling with me to India in a year or so and that had not even entered my mind. My Group Leader, Leslie would be a missionary in India and we would actually get to see her on the field while we were there. And once the year was over, I ended up at the Women's Ministry Director at our church for a year. Talk about the Lord moving. He was moving me everywhere!!!!!!!! I have now returned to BSF many years later. I used to dread Monday's but now, they are my favorite day of the week.

#11- My Church Staff- They are awesome!!!!! I love them dearly and pray for them regularly. Pastor Rick teaches the word, verse by verse. It may take us 3 weeks for 10 verses but I wouldn't have it any other way. Pastor Jim- He is an awesome Minister of Youth. He is an in-your-face youth pastor and doesn't miss a beat with all of his teens. You can't help but get excited. Pastor Forrest- Evangelism- Evangelism at heart. He can take you to the Throne room with EVERY prayer. Cindy- does she ever sits still? Occasionally - an awesome friend- Children's' Minister- so very busy and so passionate about the little ones from birth thu 5th grade. Of course all of the secretaries in the office are just AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#12- My work family- I work with a great group of people. Are we perfect? NOT!!!!! At the same time, I know that if any of us were in need of something, it would get done or get covered. Of course, there are those who are very close and know more than they probably should being a co-worker but at the same time, they are much more than that. We laugh together, get frustrated with the computers, laugh, fuss, encourage and every day is an adventure.

#13- Being a Doula- I could write in the section for hours but I won't do that. I LOVE BEING A DOULA!!!!! I believe without a shadow of a doubt that the Lord called me into being a Doula. I don't doubt for a minute that He orchestrates EVERY delivery. He leads those to me that He knows that I can help. He has so blessed me with 26 (and counting) deliveries that I wouldn't trade for the world. There is something about being invited into that room at that special and so very intimate moment with a Mom and Dad. It can be almost overwhelming. It is just amazing!!!!!! Because of being a Doula, I am now working on being a Childbirth Educator, Group Prenatal Facilitator, and who knows what could be next.

#14- Necessities- I have had the honor and privilege of being in a 3rd world country twice, and to Ukraine twice. We as Americans have so much and we are sometimes so very clueless. This Sunday while my hubby and my youngest took a nap, I cleaned. I mean, I had 3 boxes of "Stuff" and then 2 bags of clothes to give away. Partially I was ashamed that I had so much. I have watched women dressed in sari's that look like rags with huge baskets of bricks on top of their head go up 4 flights of stairs, put them down and go back and do this repeatedly for 8-10 hours a day. The key is that they have 2 sari's. One for everyday and one for the weddings and funerals. I have a closet over flowing with clothes. I have watched a precious group of Ukrainian women come to a Women's Bible Conference that last 3-4 days. All of the clothes, the blanket from home, and their Bible is all that they bring. Clothes- they may change ONE TIME!! if that!!! How many times do you change when you are out of town? The point is- I have a roof over my head. I have food in my pantry. We are healthy. Bills are paid. What more could we ask for? What do we need with all of that "Stuff".

#15- Scripture- The Bible is precious to me. I love the saying "Show me a Bible that is falling apart and I'll show you someone who is not" I realize that it is probably very silly but the other day I was looking at my Bible and noticed that the top corners on the spin are splitting. It's a leather bound one. That was the first thing that I thought of. My second was....would someone say that about me? Am I different? Do I project Him in my everyday life? Do others see or think that I have something that they want? Oh how I pray that they do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, I am caught up now. YEAH!!!!! I promise I won't fall behind....hahahahaha. How is your list going? Are you thinking about what you are thankful for? It can be the simple. It can be the complicated. Just make your list!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Laboring and being Thankful With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Tuesday---------Thankful

Well, I have made it to Tuesday. The sun is out and the weather is cool and crisp. I just love it. I was thinking this morning about being Thankful and what would I put on my list next. I think it would have to be "Being a Mother". Motherhood is something that most women want and desire. It is not easily gained by some that deal with infertility, recurrent loss or maybe even singleness.
Motherhood is a blessing. It is hard work. It is a challenge. It is rewarding. It is just awesome. My oldest was an easy child. He was a good baby. He didn't sleep until he was 18 months old. He did great in school. He is one of those kids that EVERYONE knows. He was the one that if someone was having difficulty or problems, they would always call and talk to Kyle. He is working hard with photography and has been in so many magazines. I'm just so proud of him!!!!!!
My middle was my challenge. She came to our family at the age of 8. She has a horrible background and with that came the temper, the mental illness, the rage and all of the other diagnosis that you can imagine. She is on her own. We don't have much contact and that is partially by court order and partially choice and partially protection.
My youngest was my total surprise blessing. He is almost 4 and I am amazed everyday with what comes out of his mouth. It is just amazing. He keeps me on my toes. He is active, loves sweets and chocolate and is the pickiest eater you will ever meet. He is a snuggle-er and I will drop everything when he wants to sit in my lap or lay down with me. He will be the age of my oldest before I know it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, Motherhood is difficult at times. It's a challenge but at the same time, I wouldn't do it any other way!!!!!!!!!! I only pray that I am that Proverbs 31 Woman/Mother.

Love all of you- Kyle, Tonya and Kaleb!!!!!!!!!
Mom

IT"S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!

Oh My!!!!! It's Monday AGAIN!!!!!!! The positive to my Monday is always BSF!!!! Love it!!!!!!!!

So, with the time change and everything going on at church and then coming home and we all went to sleep for a while and then the Hubby and I did our first full P90X video and then ate dinner, I didn't get to post my "Thankful" yesterday.
The message yesterday morning was about Rahab. Probably one of my favorite people in scripture. The point is that when you get to heaven, how many people will you take with you? It was truly a sobering thought.
When we stop and think about friends and family.
Friends that you have known.
Family that you love dearly.
Will they be there?
Have you done what you need to show them Christ?
Are you different because of Christ?
Do they see that you are different?
Sobering huh???????
My "Thankful" would have to be growing up in a Christian home with 2 Godly parents. Having 4 Godly Grandparents. Having a Christian husband. Have a brother and 2 children that are saved. Having the joys of teaching the Little Man that God loves him. That is what I am Thankful for.
What about you? What are you thankful for?

So that would have been yesterday's "Thankful". Today's "Thankful" would have to be my hubby. He supports me. He loves me even when I make him frustrated. He loves 3 children. He loves his job. He doesn't ever get very stressed over anything. Is he perfect? No, but who of us is perfect? Are we a perfect marriage? No, but we work hard and love each other. For him, I am truly thankful!!!!!!!! Love you Honey!!!!!

Ok, now it's your turn..........what are you thankful for?

Laboring and Thankful with you,
Doula Mama Pam

Super Saturday

Well, this is an EASY Thankful day. Today is the FIRST SATURDAY in WEEKS!!!!! that we slept in so-to-speak. We got up, participated in a "yard-sale" at church and then just are kind of doing nothing. The hubby is one who likes to be on the move all the time. I on the other hand treasure just being at home and not really doing much. The week is stressful enough.
I am just thankful for rest. Rest that is much needed. Mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Tomorrow is a day to get re-energized and ready for the week. I hope you are having an awesome day. It is beautiful day here. Talk to you soon!!!!!!!

Laboring and Resting With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Fabulous Friday!!!!!!!

The weather has changed. It was really nice. It was time for the heat to go but to go from wearing shorts one week to it being 31 degrees tonight and down to 29 tomorrow night......Not so sure about that.

Very exciting things going on and the holidays are coming and you can't help but get excited. Have you started your Thankful-For-List yet? I must be in the "List" mode. We are making a List of the Names of God in BSF and that is so much fun. Every time I find another one, I get to write it in the back of my notebook. It is just amazing to me. He is EVERYTHING!!!!!!

Work is quiet today. Worked with my "Midwife-MD" today. That is always good. We have fun working together. Speaking of being thankful and my "Midwife-MD", I would have to put that on my list on the left. He is one of those people that reads me like a book. He can tell when I hit the door how things are and what is going on. I have to say that we have worked together long enough that I can read him to. It' kind of funny. He is the most awesome OB Doc that you will EVER meet. He is soft spoken gentle, hysterically funny at times, prayer partner, praise and worship musician. He is passionate in his work and his work for the Lord. His wife is awesome. I've known her for years. They make an awesome couple. I am THANKFUL for the MD that I work for. He is also an encourager. No matter how silly my idea may seem or how big it may sound, he will encourage me and give me the information that I need.

What are you thankful for today? Please share!!!!!!!!! It can really change your perspective. I PROMISE!!!!!!!!
Have a great weekend!!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Thankful Thursday

I don't have enough time right now to write a lot so I want to keep up with my theme of being Thankful in November

4- For the change in the weather and know that He is in control.

Check in later and see what we have to share.

Doula Mama Pam

Wednesday...........Hmmmmmmm

Well, it is the middle of the week. It's cloudy, cool and they are calling for rain later on. Think I had rather be at home working on the computer and cleaning the house. Don't think that is going to happen today. Work takes president over my wants.
I hope you are having a great day. I e-mailed someone yesterday about my passion for Group Prenatal Care and guess what????? SHE E-MAILED ME BACK!!!!! I couldn't believe it when I opened my e-mail. Totally excited. She offered to talk on the phone OR I could come there. It's not that far away at UNC.........I think I want to go. What an opportunity to sit and "pick her brain" about how it works for them. How they started and what they have done with it and what their Mom's are saying. What excitement!!!!!! I will talk to the hubby about timing such a visit and see what I can do and with work as well. Patience is something that is growing and I am learning but Oh Man is it hard!!!!!!!! I will keep you posted on this adventure......Can't wait!!!!!!
It seems that the holidays are sneaking up on us. Christmas decorations are already all over the place. I am even signed up to have a booth at 2 different Craft/Christmas Shows. Very excited!!!!! It will be a lot of fun and I have a lot of stuff all ready made and ready to sell. I will get some pictures up.
Thanksgiving is right around the corner and of course the talk and theme seems to be "What are you thankful for?". Well, my first thought is.....why do we only do this one time a year? Shame on us!!!!!! The thought of being thankful all year long seems foreign to some. I have started on the left sidebar a list of what I am thankful for. I realize that it is only November 3rd and there is not much there so that means, there is plenty of time for you to jump in and post yours in the comments or start your own. Thankfulness is something that we need to express and practice EVERYDAY!!!! not just during the month of November and more importantly, not just during the good times.
I will try and get pictures up tonight so that you can see what I make and what I do. I hope you like them. Of course, if you would like any of them, please let me know and I would be happy to mail them to you if you are far away or meet you somewhere if you live in the Triad area.
Have an awesome day!!!!!!!! Thanks again for stopping by.

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

It is just a Testimony Tuesday!!!!!!!

Have you ever had one of those times when you just can't seem to contain yourself?
You just feel like you could bust?
Your perspective is different?
Your attitude is different?
Well, that is where I think I am at today. You see, all of the things that have been going on with work and other dealings with this and that and trying to HELP HIM, I got myself in such a place that I just kind of wanted to just start all over again and try something new and find another avenue. The problem is not where I am but what I was doing.
Pam had her plan.
Pam wanted to do it her way.
Pam wanted to do it in her time.
Pam obviously knows better (NOT!)
When we get into that type of mind-frame we completely loose sight of the goal that the Lord has planned. Our perspective has become so self focused, self absorbed and we are suffering from the I-Me-My Syndrome and the Lord has been placed over in a corner somewhere and we go to Him when things are not what I think that they should be or things are not moving as fast as I think that they should be. If my perspective is so focused on the I-Me-My then there is no room at all for HIM!!!! This is NOT what He wants or desires for us. When we become so arrogant and prideful we have 2 choices.
First, we work ourselves in a tizzy over the small things and the worries and the fears and all of the other stress when We are in control and He will use something to bring us to the point of realizing that we are not the ones in control . This is NOT a pleasant situation to be in. It's not the "warm and fuzzy" feelings that you get. This is discipline that is meant to get your attention. This is to help you realize that you have taken His place. He will use what He needs to in order to get your attention. He is YOUR HEAVENLY FATHER and HE WANTS WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU.
Second option- We can stop right now, yes right now! THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING!!!!! Are you in the pride and arrogance and the I-Me-My Syndrome? If you stop right now and pray about it. I mean really pray about it and He sheds light on the area where you have taken His place, then confess it, correct it and praise Him that He showed it to you. Give Him His rightful place back that you have taken. Your entire perspective will change. Your attitude will change. Your thoughts will change. You will not have the I-Me-My Syndrome. It will be all about Him and His Best For You!!!!!!!
I have been so blessed at BSF and there are nights that I wish we could just sit and talk and talk and talk and really share about what the Lord is doing. Do you ever feel that way with your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ? The Lord is moving. I have seen Him do it. He is still doing it. It's just amazing. Right down to the simple things. He cares about all of it!!!!!!!!
Thanks for stopping by today. Oh, make sure that you check out the list of "Thankfulness for...." sidebar. What are you Thankful for??????

Laboring and Testifying with you,
Doula Mama Pam

Monday.......What a Monday!!!!!!!

Way to much to share today. So much is happening. It would take me a full 8 hours to write everything that is happening and then tell you about each one and all of the details. So I was thinking that I would just list them. That seemed the easiest way to do it. If you want to know more, feel free to ask or post a comment or send me an e-mail.
So, grab a cup of coffee, a Diet Coke, cup of tea or whatever you like and let's get started......

***BSF (Bible Study Fellowship)- well, it is just AWESOME!!!!!! LOVE IT!!!!!! Blesses my socks off EVERY WEEK!!!!
***Kaleb is going to be 4 and that is totally overwhelming and what a blessing.
***Kyle will be 22 soon and that is just amazing and such a blessing.
***Tonya is now 19 and I don't have contact with her at all BUT HE KNOWS WHERE SHE IS!!!
***Hubby is getting ready to run a race.......SOOOO VERY PROUD!!!!!
***Working on a new "website/blog thing". Total focus will be pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding and birth stories. Contacted Hot Bliggity Blog and they are going to help me design it. VERY EXCITING!!!!! ANY IDEAS!!!!??????
***Still working on Childbirth Educator Modules and in need of 2 different books to finish up all the modules.....WHOOO HOOOO!!!!!!
***Filing an "Abstract Submission" to Lamaze International for the big conference in Texas next year. How cool would that be to be invited to go to and share. Only if He wants me there will I be there.
***Still working and praying over "Group Prenatal Care" Program at the office. Since we are not a private practice, it must go through many channels to be approved. Being brave and hoping for January.
***Getting ready for a Half Marathon in February.
***Craft/Jewelry Shows on November 13th and November 20th. (Come by and see me!!!)
***Being with my parents this year for Thanksgiving!!!!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!

Can you say------BUSY!!!!----- Hubby and I keep talking about how busy we are. It is just crazy sometimes. Just totally wears me out looking at a calendar.

What all is He doing in your life? Are you busy?
Challenge for Thanksgiving coming up.....stay tuned!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

ITS FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!

I needed something to make me smile or should I say laugh........This is just a Fun Friday!!!!!!

SHOUTING FROM THE ROOF TOPS!!!!!!

2 weeks ago I posted this and then I came back and posted this . Well, I am here to TESTIFY that when we finally get our senses and take our hands off something and place it in His hands and not try to HELP HIM do what we think He should do, He is FAITHFUL!!!!!!!

Today, I had "The Meeting". It took time and patience on my part more than anyone. I waited.
Was it difficult.....yes.
Was it worth it.....YES!!!!!!!!
I went to a meeting with my supervisor and 3 physicians and an extender. I was terrified BUT at the same time there was this overwhelming sense of peace. We know where that was coming from!!!!!!!!
I presented my proposal.
I used my research.
I answered some very difficult questions with confidence.
There is NO WAY!!!! I could have done it without HIM!!!!!!!!
It was absolutely amazing. I am exhausted but at the same time I want to bounce off of the ceiling!!!!!!! It was amazing!!!!!!!! He was sitting right there with me at that huge conference table that is so intimidating.
I can do nothing but Praise Him. It went Great!!!!! Now for more of the waiting. No change ever happens quickly. Especially in a large company. That is ok with me. It is just more time for research and more time for learning. Continue on with what has been started and just watch Him work. Trust and Obey is what He is asking of me.
Well, I am about to burst.....I had better stop typing and get this posted to share. Thank you for sharing in the journey.

Praising My Lord,
Doula Mama Pam

Breast Cancer Testimony!!!!!!!

I am so excited to share this!!!!!!!! I am just so blessed to see how the Lord is working and healing. Many of you may know Darlene and her sweet family. Thank you so much Darlene for taking the time to share the Lord's work in your life!!!!!!

I am a breast cancer survivor. I was diagnosed five years ago as of this November 1st. It was two days before my 35th birthday and I was pregnant with my fourth child at the time. In spite of all the uncertainty, fear, questions, anger, devastation, and heartbreak, I can look back now and see how God worked as the Master Planner and carried me every step of the way. My unborn son and my three small children (ages 6, 3, and 1 1/2 at the time) were exactly the motivation I needed to survive. My pregnancy was a miracle in itself and I had peace as I trusted that God allowed me to conceive this baby that I might raise him along with my three other children. He is now a very healthy, talkative, social, lovable 4 year old and we are so blessed!


Due to my young age at the time of diagnosis, I was tested for the BRCA gene and found that I have BRCA1, which predisposes for breast and ovarian cancer. With no family history of breast cancer, this was a shock. However, with the information that BRCA1 significantly increases the risk of ovarian cancer and recurrence of breast cancer, the decision to have a double mastectomy and have my ovaries removed was an easy decision to make. I wanted to do all I could, within my power, to maximize my chances of living a healthy life. As a result of having all of my God-given female parts removed :), I have a less than 5% chance of recurrence. I am so grateful for technology and the information it provides which can be used to save lives.


The past four years have been the best of my life. I am so thankful for a merciful God who preserved my life during a time when I did not know Him. Clearly, He knew the plans He had for me and didn't want me to miss them!

In His hands,
Darlene Boan

Thank you again Darlene for your willingness to share!!!!!!

Georgia On My Mind

Yes, we were in Georgia this past weekend and it was just WONDERFUL!!!!! No real agenda and just time to rest. I think we got over 2/3 of our Christmas shopping done!!!!!!!!!! VERY excited about that!!!!!!!! Thought I would just share some of the beauty of the place where my parents live. It is just gorgeous!!!!!!!!!

Not Me Monday

I DID NOT come home from getting to go shopping with the Hubby to my parent's house and find out that Kaleb had had a great time.

I DID NOT walk into my parents bathroom and see very small whisps of hair lying on the bathroom floor.

I DID NOT just burst into laughter because "It was about time" that happened.

I DID NOT very calmly ask Kaleb what happened.

I DID NOT laugh when he continually changed the story all weekend to answer the question "Who cut your hair?" Papa Did, Mema Did, even blamed the poor scissors. It was a great laugh.
Of course there was not a lot of damage and you have to look close to see the "Kaleb V-Cut" right in the front middle.


How was your weekend?????

Part 2----It's Monday!!!!!!!!

Ok, here is part 2. It never ceases to amaze me. I have the time and energy to write and some days, I could probably write for hours. Anyway, I made mention earlier that I would post the link to the sermon from Pastor Rick that spoke so loud and clear to me yesterday. If you click here you can listen to his message. POWERFUL!!!!
I thought I would share some notes with you that I took yesterday during the service. They spoke volumes to me. I pray that the Lord would use them to speak to you as well.

Text- Joshua 1:10-11 (we are going through the book of Joshua together as a church body)
Teacher- Rick Byrd
Theme- Moving Ahead in Faith
Take-A-Way- When God gives a special assignment, His people must move ahead in faith.
Question for me-
Will you accept God's assignment for your life? Are you willing to move ahead in faith to reach your promised land?

Well, right off the bat I knew that this message was the reason I was there. The night before, the Hubby and I had a conversation about "What I wanted to do when I grown up" (not in a negative sense but you know what I mean).

The Lord had given Joshua specific instructions. Joshua then took those instructions to the leaders in the camp and shared them. Joshua had taken the place of leadership. In that role of leadership, people were looking up to him. Rick talked about all of us being in places of leadership whether it was in our home, work, neighborhood, business owner, or even at church as a part of the staff or the Lay Ministry.
He talked about the 4 qualities of leadership.
1- He/She spends time with God.
Spending time in the Bible, Prayer, Meditating on Him and His word.
Do the people that you are in a leadership role, see you as a leader who spends time with God?
2- Take Tough Stands
Joshua had received his orders. What was he to do with them? Follow through and do what he was told.
How much are we willing to pay with sweat and work? Of course with taking a tough stand comes with criticism, fatigue, loneliness and rejection.
3. Delegates responsibility
Joshua ordered the officers. He uses the people according to their gifts.
What are you being asked to do according to your gifts? Are you using your gifts?
4. Plans Ahead
Joshua was ready to move ahead. There would be planning and the the action follow through of what he was asked to do.
a-Prepare- be ready and supplies ready
b-Pass over - Joshua told them that they will cross the Jordan. The word will is not in the future tense but in the confident resolve that it WILL happen.
c-Posses- take possession of the land.
Col 4:17- see to it to complete the work.

What encouragement this gave me. What power there is in His Word. I was once again amazed and could not help but just to praise Him for giving me exactly what I needed. Now comes that part that we all love.
What is my assignment from Him and What will I do once, He gives it to me? I think I have 3 choices. Of course, only one is the right choice.
1- Take it and act on it!!
2- Delay and wait for the entire plan to be laid out in front of me with a time line and details and all of the necessary cost that it will take.
3- Choose to do it MY way.
Obviously, we know what the answer to my part is. Now comes the waiting for the assignment. I can't help but to be excited!!!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

It's Monday!!!!!!!!

What were you doing yesterday? Did it involve going to church? I sure hope it did. I know that I was missing being in worship. We had been out of town for 3 Sundays and then we had one week of having to work on Sunday. It had been a while and I sure had missed it. It was just wonderful. There is something about sitting in a sanctuary with fellow believers, brothers and sisters in Christ and worshiping. It is just such a blessing.
Dealing with a lot that is going on right now, it was the PERFECT message that I needed to hear. I have no doubt that the Lord had me there. Right where I was suppose to be. It was one of those messages that I felt like the Lord had just for me.
Exactly what I was suppose to hear.
Exactly what I was to be praying about.
Exactly what I am to be doing and not doing.
Exactly what He wanted to say to me and He used Rick.

I always just stand in amazement of how He works. I realize more and more everyday who He is and what more He wants to show me. I will post at lunch the notes from the sermon yesterday and a link. If you need some encouragement today, I would challenge you to check it out. I leave you with a video. I am sure it has been posted before but can't help to share it again. Worship with me......



Laboring and Worshiping With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day-updated- updated again

Today, October 15th, is a special day. Maybe a bittersweet day for some. Maybe you have a close friend, a family member or someone that is especially close to you that has lost a little one. Maybe it was due to miscarriage. Maybe it was in those early days in a NICU or even due to SIDS or an illness. It is a feeling and experience I would NEVER want anyone to experience. I follow many different blogs. Some are the fun ones. Some are the crafty. Some are the Pregnancy/Childbirth/Doula etc. blog. A lot of them are precious women that have lost one child and even some have lost more. I am encouraged and amazed by their strength, their faith in The Father and their commitment to the Lord. Last year I shared my experience with miscarriage. It was a very trying time and one I don't want to repeat. At the same time, because of that experience, I can help, understand and minister to those that are in that place of loss through miscarriage. This year, I chose to ask 2 people to share their experience. This can be difficult but it is a blessing to hear the encouragement. The first is our Pastor's Wife. Her name is Nancy. She is just a wonderful woman. Funny, encouraging, passionate about her ministry and a huge heart for the Lord and for her family. She and Rick have 2 children, Trent and Hannah. Below is her story and experience. I hope that it is a blessing to you. If you would like to leave a prayer request, please do so in the comments. Nancy, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING!!!!!!!!

In the "medical world", a female patients medical record always includes a statement that reads, "gravida ___para___". "Gravida" means the number of pregnancies she has had, "Para" means the number of live births. My record states "Gravida 6, Para 2". Most women never read that part of their records, and if they do, probably don't know what it means. At a time in my young married life when many friends were planning what SEASON to have their baby in, we began to wonder whether it might happen for us at all. It seemed that many couples we knew were having no trouble with "starting a family". I didn't even know at the time of my first miscarriage that it WAS a miscarriage until it happened again. As we began a long road of infertility treatments, I saw the process in such a clinical and technical way, that I didn't even think of the first two miscarriages as the loss of a baby. I protected my mind and heart that way. Because Rick and I were so grieved over not being able to have a baby that the grief of the miscarriages just became a part of it all. The Lord never let us fall apart at the same time. I came home from work one day and there was a wet spot on the living room floor. I looked up to see if there was a leak in the ceiling. I found out that Rick had been on his face before the Lord, weeping and pleading with Him for a child, or for relief from the horrible emptiness of wanting one so badly. I usually did my crying in the bathroom at the hospital where I worked, after another negative pregnancy test, then pulled it together on the 30 mile drive home. Rick and I finally came to a point where we agreed before the Lord that if he did not will for us to be parents, we would love Him no matter what, and continue to look to Him to fill all the desires of our heart. After almost 5 years and test after test, God gave us our son, Trent. I thought that everything had finally been addressed and, "all the parts were working now".. The same problem continued and when the third and fourth miscarriage occurred, I still had an "unattached" feeling about those lost babies. God did bless us again, after more treatment and tests, with Hannah. It was not until a short time later, when Trent asked whether we could have more children for him to play with, that I shared that we had some babies who "had not been able to be born". I am absolutely positive that I shared way too much information to that little boy! Being the brilliant, and insightful child that he was, he asked, "Well are they in Heaven with Jesus?" My heart and mind were suddenly opened! They were! They are! And like Trent said; "We'll get to play with them up there!" I finally allowed my heart to attach to those four babies, with God using a six year old to help me see! I can't wait to meet my other four children!


This next one is from a sweet friend named Dana. I was blessed to teach her oldest in Pre-School and fell in love with his name. They even spell is differently, just like us. I know this was not an easy thing for her to do but I have had the priviledge to watch her grow so much in the Lord. Thank you Dana for sharing!!!!!!!

Well I am not sure where to start. In June of 1998 we were blessed with a little baby boy. He was our joy and had our heart. We didn’t think we would ever have another child. Our son had been through so much his first year of life. He had two surgeries one at 5 weeks old and then right before a year old. When he was about 6 months old I started to having problems with my eyes. All the medications that I was on for my eyes could cause birth defects that would show up on the face of the child. So we were not planning on having anymore. God had other plans for us. In 2002 my blood pressure went way high and so the doctor took me off of the pill. Within weeks it happened. I was having a baby. We were a little scared due to all the medications that I had been on but we knew God would take care of us. So we went to the doctor as planned at 9 weeks and everything was great. I was suppose to go back in 4 weeks but that didn’t happen. I had went on a trip with my mom and I started having back pain. So when I got home I rested thinking I was tried. Over the next few days I spotted some and called the doctor and they asked me to come in. My doctor was out so I saw another one. He walked in the room and went to check me and said that I was not measuring 12 weeks like I should be. So he order a ultrasound and that showed no heart beat and I was only measuring 8 weeks. So I went back to work thinking I could work the rest of the day. My husband got to my work and I lost it. I had to tell him that we lost the baby. I couldn’t believe that God would do this to us. I was mad that I was going to have to tell my 4 year old son that we were not going to have a baby. I didn’t want to go to church anymore. I was so mad that God took this baby away from me. The next day I went in for my D and C and begged for a ultrasound just to make sure. I wanted to see if they were wrong. The doctor wouldn’t do one he could tell I was still upset. I took the next week off. I spent a lot of time wanting to know why this happened. One of my friends reminded that God gave us his son and now my baby was with him. He/she was in a place with the greatest gift of all our Father. Then I couldn’t be mad anymore I was still sad at times. I am not going to tell you that it didn’t take some time to get passed it. By June of that year I was having a baby again. God blessed my family with a healthy little girl. In our eyes she was perfect in every way. Now I cant think of my life with out going through this because I would not have my little girl. Both of my children have blessed me more than I can say. Every year on my due date ,Sept 15, I think about my baby who I will know one day when I get to my Fathers house. I had a ring made with all three of my childrens birthstones in it. I have a piece of each one of them with me daily. A lot of people ask me about that ring and I freely tell them it is for my children. Some look at me like you only have 2 children and ask about the other one. I get to tell them it is in my Fathers hand in heaven.

This precious lady is named Cindy. She is a very dear friend of mine. She meets with me and we get to encourage each other over Mexican food and of course, you know there is always cheese dip. She shared hers in the comments and I chose to bring it to the post as well. I was hoping she would. I had not asked her because she is sooooo very busy. She and her family are preparing to go to Spain as missionaries. All of that being said, she has shared her story and I want to share it with you as well.

My records would read Gravida 10 Para 3. I had 6 miscarriages, one ectopic pregnancy, and 3 live births. When asked how I survived that many losses I only can answer that through the grace of God and a similar reaction to Nancy. The hurt had to become seperated from reality. I had to at times look at the loss with a clinical approach. There were days I yelled, screamed, hollered, stomped my feet and shook my fists, there were other days that I cried from sun up to sun down, and then there were days where I just sat in silence.We lost our first child in 1988. He/She was due on mother's day of 1989. Mother's day have never been the same. Yes, I celebrate the lives of the three children he blessed me with, but still 22 years later that lump in the throat still returns and my arms still ache to hold the children who I never saw.God has been faithful and true to hold me in the hurt and to enable me to share with women in a way that I never thought possible. Just yesterday I got to speak to a lady who lost a child. We were able to share the guilt we felt as if it were our own fault and the anger from words said without thinking. God has redeemed the lost and the hurt, but I cannot wait for the day that I will sit around the throne with ALL my 10 children and worship the Lord together.

Thank you so much for sharing. What a blessing!!!!!!

Laboring and Praying With You,
Doula Mama Pam

It's a BIRTH-DAY!!!!!!!!

Just to give you a quick update. A new little boy made it into the world yesterday. I took the day to go and be with this Mom and her Husband and family. I would not have missed it for anything.
I will be sharing his story very soon. I am almost finished writing but need to add the pictures. She is the Mom of Parker that I wrote about last September. Jackson was a complete suprise to us but not to the Lord. Nothing suprises Him.
It was a bit longer than her last delivery but she was what you would call in the Doula/Childbirth Educator/Midwife world "A strong and powerful Mama"!!!!!!! The amazing part is that I have watched this young lady grow up to be a super wife and mother.
We actually had 2 physicians. One in surgery and checking between cases and one had to come flying over when Jackson was almost here. It was just an awesome day.
It never ceases to amaze me that when I get to the point when I really think that "this is not working, and I need to regroup" that the Lord just blesses my socks off with such an exciting day and birth and just reassures me, I am right where I am suppose to be.
I will try and get everything up this evening.........stay tuned......of course, plenty of pictures.

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Who Is He????

I have a MOM (My Other Mother) who has a blog as well now. She wrote the other day about "Is Jesus Enough". In the post she talked about how people are always talking about
"What He can do for you" and we don't stop and think about WHO He is. So taking that a little further it made me stop and think Who He Is to Me............................. I think it is awesome how He is working because in BSF we were challenged to keep track of all the names of God that we find as we study.
So AWESOME!!!!!!!
So, here is my list.......
He Is..........
Redeemer
Friend that never leaves
The Lover of my soul
Best Friend
SAVIOR
Rock
Refuge
Companion
Warrior
Shield
Passion
Provider
Almighty God
Omnicient
Omnipresent
King
Jesus
Comforter
Source of Help
Healer
Holy One
Alpha
Omega
Creator
Eternal
Forgiver
Giver of Life
Emanuel
Master
Lion of Judah
Strength
Truth

So, this is my list (just to get started).......what does yours look like? Get one started and share it.......WHAT is HE TO YOU!!!!!!!???????

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Clarification of Last Thursdays Post........

In reading the post from last Thursday, I wanted to give some clarification to the post.
First, it was not meant to be shared as a "Pity Party for Pam". It was not meant as a "Poor Pitiful Pam" post either.
The reason for the post was to
First- share what was going on at the time.
Secondly (and most importantly)- was to show you something above all.
HE IS ANSWERING!!!!
I shared what was going on and the anxiety and the stress and the tension and the overwhelming sense that "I can't do this anymore".
Have you felt that way?
Have you felt like that today?
Do you know someone that is feeling that way that is looking to you for help and support?
The point of the post
When we take things into
Our Hands
Our Way
Our Time
Our Focus
Our Agenda
You see where this is going??????
When on the other side is waiting our Heavenly Father that loves us more than we can ever fathom. He will allow us sometimes to let us work as "we" see fit and when we hit the bottom and have put ourselves into a frenzy and can't figure out what is wrong and why we feel the way we do and we are discouraged and down and overwhelmed,
He is waiting and reminds you...
My Way
My Thoughts
My Plans
My Time,
My Focus
My Agenda
You can do nothing but just Praise Him at that moment for the sweet release. He already knows and He is just waiting for you. He didn't leave you. He never will. We just get busy trying to "help Him". Do you see the difference? Have you experienced it? He's just waiting for you. Let Him take it. He loves you so very much!!!!!!!!!!

So you see, it was not a pity party or a poor pitiful me post. It was a testimony of Praise as to what He is doing in my life and I pray that is what He is doing in yours. Have an awesome Monday!!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Breast Cancer Testiomony

I am excited to get to post some of these testimonies. I was excited when the first person that responded to me was my Mom. I knew she would do it and so glad that she did. Hers is short and sweet but I remember the day like it was yesterday. I remember where I was, what we were doing, how I responded. I guess I can write one to. I just might do that..... Anyway, here is my Mom's. I'm so thankful for her. I take her for granted and don't tell her very often like I should but I LOVE YOU MOM!!!! I only pray that I can be like you when I grow up.......


I was diagnosed with breast cancer in December of 1993. My cancer was found only because my daughter, Pam, insisted that I have a physical and a mammogram done. The cancer showed up on my mammogram. Because it was found early, I was advised to have only radiation treatments. I began my treatments in January of 1994 and completed them on April 15, 1994. Since that time, I have been cancer-free. During that time, it was prayers and support of family and friends that got me through the difficult days. I thank God that my daughter insisted on the mammogram.

I would encourage every woman to have a mammogram each year, and I am faithful in doing that now. I am living proof that mammograms and prayer works.

Thanks for sharing!!!!!! Love you!!!!!

Doula Mama Pam
Midwife-wanna-be

Just Need To Share........This May Not Make Any Sense....

Grab a cup of coffee, diet drink or whatever is close by. I just need to share, shout, rejoice, or whatever you would like to call it. I have been struggling and thinking and struggling more with so much in the past couple of weeks.
Why struggle you say?????
Well, Pam has been very focused on "What Pam wants to do" and not "what the Lord wants Pam to do".
I want to share some examples and this is really difficult because they may not make sense to those who do not know me very well. If you know me and know my heart, you will totally understand.
So, here we go.....
First, with work. Yes, I love the office. We all get a long fine and the doctors are great. My frustration arises out of the fact that I get so fed up with pushing papers and dealing with insurance and dealing with precert this and precert that. Insurances dictating what can and cannot be done and trying to explain that to patients is very frustrating at times. I want so badly to interact with our pregnant mom's and their families and walk through this time in their life with them all the way through delivery. I put together a packet/proposal for our office to offer something new and exciting for our patients and for us to "be out of the box" in the Triad. A lot of work, prayer, tears and sweat. Presented it and NOTHING!!!! was said!!!!! Not ONE WORD!!!!!! I was angry, sad, devastated and ready to throw my hands up and say "I give up". I have since calmed down and realized for whatever reason it maybe wait but not to stop reading and educating myself and in that I LOVE IT!!!! If that means I need to wait--then we wait.....Do I like it??? Yes and No. I want it NOW but at the same time I want it when He wants it.
Second, I was beginning to wonder if Mothering the Mother was really going to work and be productive to the point of being able to do it fulltime at some point. With the frustration at work, I questioned and doubted and became really down and very hard on myself. What was the matter? What was I doing wrong? THEN........(you will have to hang on for a minute)
Thirdly, He placed me in BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) to study the book of Isaiah. I am so excited and so thrilled with this. It requires discipline and work and study and prayer and digging into the word. It is such a blessing of which I just so grateful for.

ANSWERS to ALL of my worries, concerns and frustrations........sitting in the car
We(as a family) decided to go to Georgia this year for Thanksgiving. Can't tell you what that means. Anyway, with the decision to go to Georgia makes the choice in what I can do as far as being a Doula. That is ok. Not a problem. I mentioned earlier about the worry of being able to keep Mothering The Mother up because I had not had a lot of contacts etc. WELL, I ended up being contacted by several Moms. By several I mean 6. Yes, 6!!!!! I am only able to take on one because her due date is in December. That rolls into the work and the frustration there. Not being able to take on the ones in November and the one that found someone while I was on vacation. I don't have to worry about being gone from work while a co-worker, that I will be covering for, will be away for over a week on a cruise. It takes a HUGE amount of stress off trying to figure out how to juggle work and being a Doula but HE always manages it just beautifully. In a post a little later on I will tell you about my proposal that I came up with for work. It's exciting and I so desire to follow it through. Yes, I will wait on my Lord to tell me when.
All of this being said- The Lord put me in BSF to be with all of these 600 women. My small group of just precious women. My group leader is fabulous!!!!!! I sat in the parking lot this past Monday night and really even struggled with getting out of the car and going in because I was so totally down. I mean to the point of tears. The Lord spoke so clear. HE IS IN CONTROL! TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF AND WATCH ME WORK!!!!!! I could do nothing but cry. I am sure the women walking by my car were wondering what I was doing. They were not tears of sadness or sorrow but of a huge burden lifted. He knows my heart. He knows my desires. I believe He put them there. Since Monday, of the 6 Mom's that contacted me that I mentioned above, 4 were after Monday. HE IS SO GOOD!!!!!! Am I still stressed? Yes, it creeps in but I just go back to "open-handed Pam"

I am doing so much reading and researching and working on "self-educating" that it just gets so exciting. I love it!!!!!!!! I came home the other night with a research study and was just about to bust to show it to my hubby. It just tickles me to death when he reads it and agrees with me.

Ok, I could keep going on and on and on but I will stop for now. What is He doing in your life? Has He told you to take your hands off of something? Did you? There is such sweet surrender in that. Don't get me wrong....I still want to grab it and run with it but He just reminds me, "Let me do this FOR YOU." Imagine what He can do with it that I can't........PRAISE HIM!!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam
Midwife-Wanna-Be

Updates!!!!!

First- The Women's Only 5K was AWESOME!!!!!! A total sea of PINK!!!!!! Of course there were some red shirts in there.....actually a lot of them but I will get to that later. It was a beautiful morning and the race was so well planned and the course had changed and that was just perfect!!!!! I LOVED IT!!! It was soooo much fun. I am going to see if I can try and get some pictures uploaded soon.

After the race we went to the Dixie Classic Fair.....FUN!!!!!! Kaleb rode his first roller-coaster with me. It was so much fun. I asked him this morning if he enjoyed ridding on the WORM at the Fair and he said VERY clearly "NO"!!!!!! Of course I took pictures of everything possible that you can get that is fried. I think I got nauseated from just reading the signs. It is just GROSS!!!!!!!

We finally made it home after a very LONG dinner- I will explain that later. It is a post all by itself. We were exhausted!!!!!!!!!!!

I had mentioned in my last post that I was going to get some "Breast Cancer Testimonies". I am excited to say that I know of 3 on the way and I have 2 already. Of course if you have one that you would like to share, please feel free to do so. I would love to hear them.

Last but not least.....I have been contacted to start an ICAN Group in the Triad. I am so excited but so nervous. I have a lot of reading to see about all of that but it's such an honor to be contacted. Oh, ICAN is the International Cesarean Awareness Network. They have awesome information on their website. Feel free to look them up. More on that later.

Thanks for checking in......oh one more thing......we are STILL waiting on a little boy to chose when he would like to celebrate his birthday...........I will keep you posted!!!!!!


Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam
Midwife-Wanna-Be

IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!!!!

I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!! IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!!!

It has been a VERY long week after coming in from being gone for almost 2 weeks but I would do it again tomorrow if the opportunity came up. The old saying that you need a vacation from your vacation.....yeah, that is what I need. I was actually kidding with my husband this morning because he hasn't unpacked yet from the beach. I told him he was in denial that we were not there anymore.

What do you have planned for the weekend?????
Ours is just going to be crazy. Bo has to work 4 hours on Saturday and Sunday. While he is doing that, I get to go run in a race. It's the Women's Only 5K Walk/Run. Our local hospital sponsors it and all of the funds raise go to support the Mammogram Scholarship for those women that don't have insurance and need a mammogram. Well worth it to go and even if you don't run, to just walk is GREAT!!!!!!
Breast Cancer touches so many women and families. I know it has touched ours. My Mother's Mother (My Granny) had Breast Cancer and my Mom had Breast Cancer. Both of which are Survivors and my "Other Grandmother" Mama Jean had Breast Cancer just in the last 2 years and she of course is a Survivor as well. Maybe since it is October and Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I can get some testimonies to post from Family, Friends to share and encourage.

Of course, there is a little one waiting to make his grand entrance into this world. We are really praying it will be this weekend. Mom did a fabulous job last time. 4 hours!!!!! First baby!!!! Incredible!!!!!!! Strong and Powerful Mama!!!!!! Keeping the phone close......of course, get to work with my Midwifery Doctor which is just awesome!!!!!!!!

Sunday of course is always the best day of the week. Can't wait!!!!!!!!! Get my baby fix on Sunday night keeping the nursery. They will be rotten when they leave!!!!!!!

I'll try and post some pictures from the beach. We had such a good time. LOVED IT!!!!!
Have an awesome weekend!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam
Midwife-Wanna-Be

Meetings...Meeting and Now The Waiting......

Well, yesterday was a day I had planned and planned and planned even more. I have been a Doula for over 2 years now and love every minute of it. I wouldn't trade it for anything. It is such an exciting time and Oh!! what an adventure to watch a couple transition into being a family. Just absolutely powerful. In my finite mind I would love to be able to present such a thing to our patients.
I had proposed it before and didn't get a good response. There of course is always the concern of not being able to get the rest of the million things that I am responsible for done. My goal is to move from doing what I am doing to something more with the patients and having a relationship with them. Working with them through out their pregnancy with education, sharing, talking, connecting and those types of things.
I worked and prayed and worked and prayed and put a nice packet together. Bought beautiful pastel colored folders and everything. Typed up a cover letter, supported it with research, and the actual proposal itself and even a packet of information that could be discussed through out the pregnancy.
VERY EXCITED AND VERY NERVOUS!!!!
I went and requested a meeting with our CEO. She is a very nice lady and very open minded and it was awesome that I even got an appointment with her. I had basically worked myself into a tizzy over going to see her. No sleep, stomach in knots, the whole thing. I met with her and we talked and I explained. She was impressed with the presentation so to speak, I think. At the same time, I already knew that nothing would happen right then. We will talk with the doctors and your site administrator and just see what they think. Part of me knew that. At the same time, my heart just sank. I wanted her to be as excited about it as I was. One positive thing that she said was "Don't sell yourself short" I hung on to that all afternoon
I then had arranged to be gone during an extended lunch so I went and spent sometime with a colleague that works in another practice. She is just awesome. She had actually been working at our local hospital and now works in an office. She is a Women's' Health Nurse Practitioner. She is actually the one that introduced me to the whole Group Prenatal Care idea. She is one of those people that you can not help but get excited when you talk to her. She is just AWESOME. So I went and we talked about how to do it here, what would be the steps, how to tweak it to work here and try something new. She said something to me that just meant the world and she probably has no idea that she said it. "It's really hard when people squish your enthusiasm". I thought, you are exactly right. It is just so very hard!!!!!!!!

So.....now that you know more than you wanted to know.....
What is the next step?
Where do I go from here?
What do I do next with this whole idea?

First is to keep praying and seeking for His direction
Second is to just keep doing what I have been doing. Keep reading EVERYTHING I can get my hands on.
Third is to be open and ready to move if that is what is called for. Scary as that would be.
Fourth is to keep researching Midwifery programs. Who knows if that is an avenue but I am VERY interested!!!!!!!!

Well, it's time to get back to the stack of work laying on my desk.
Have a great afternoon.
Praying for a baby this weekend.....Mom and Dad are ready.....wonder if he is?????

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Midwifery School???????

Have you ever had that time in your life when you think......
What if.......?
That is where I am. I have been reading and reading and did I mention reading? I have read everything that I can about being a Midwife.
Did you have any idea that there were so many types of Midwives?
Did you know it also depends on where you live as to what you can practice?
Did you know that it also depends on what the initials are behind your name as to what you can do?

CNM- Certified Nurse Midwife
CPM- Certified Professional Midwife
DEM- Direct Entry Midwife
CM- Certified Midwife

Now I found out today that there is one place that you can go on line that has 3 different levels from an Associates in Midwifery, Bachelors in Midwifery, and even a Masters in Midwifery. Now that I am totally confused about all of the initials, the diploma's and the powers at be that decide on what you can do in each state I am a mess.

Just for the record there are also other higher groups that provide provision over Midwives depending on which one that you are such as

NCOFM- North Carolina Friends of Midwives
NARM- North American Registry of Midwives
MANA- Midwives Alliance of North America
MEAC-Midwifery Education and Accreditation Council

Are you as totally confused as I am? I am VERY interested in several programs. It is just really hard right now because in the state of North Carolina you must be a Certified Nurse Midwife to practice. My other thought to this whole thing would to be to become a CPM and maybe be able to work in the clinical side of the practice and get out of the paper pushing, insurance, pre-certification aspect of the office. Who knows, if the statutes and laws change and North Carolina recognizes a CPM then I would be ready to go.

I did find one school that offers a great class called "Introduction to Midwifery". I am really thinking about taking it for 2 reasons. One is to make sure this is something that I really want to do. Secondly would be to make sure that I can work full time and get homework done as well. Obviously, the Lord will direct the details and I am along for the ride and we will see where He takes me. I hope you will stick around for the journey. It's going to be a RIDE!!!!!


Laboring with You,
Doula Mama Pam
Midwife-Wanna-Be (with a million initials behind my name....hahahaha)

It's Almost The Holidays.......NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Can you believe it ???? It is almost the holidays AGAIN!!!!!????? Where in the world has this year gone?
What happen to the spring?
What happen to the summer?
Fall is here and now we are already seeing the Halloween stuff appearing and we all know what is right around the corner........CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS!!!!!!

In light of that, I am going to be in Madison the weekend before Thanksgiving at a Craft Fair. I will be there with my other hat on known as "The Earring Lady". I agreed to go to this one as long as there was not 20 other jewelry vendors there. I LOVE making the earrings and bracelets. They are so much fun. I typically get my beads while I am down at the beach. That way I will hopefully have beads and stones that the average person would not have which makes them a bit more unique. I would love to have you come out and see me at the event. I will be posting more about it as it becomes available. I'll also post some pictures of my earrings and bracelets so that you can see them. Of course this one is special because we (the vendors) are bringing in our favorite holiday goodies for you to munch on while you shop......what more could you ask for.....food and jewelry in the same place!!!!!!!! It's going to be great!!!!! Remember- the weekend before Thanksgiving....Mark it on your calendar and we will see you there!!!!!!!!

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam

Bible Study

What are you doing for Bible Study right now?
Are you doing a book that someone has written?
Are you doing a book of the Bible, studying through it?

Well, I am sure that many would tell me that I am absolutely nuts but I promise that I am not.

I am blessed to be in Bible Study Fellowship this year. It is an absolutely awesome program. We are studying the book of Isaiah and I am just blown away. It is so current and so very relevant to present day. I get so frustrated when I hear people say that they don't study the Old Testament because it doesn't apply to today........Well, I am hear to say...Just read the first chapter of Isaiah and it could change your mind. Totally excited!!!!!! There is something about being with approx. 600 women. Yes, 600 women in one place all hungry for the Word of the Lord!!!!! So very exciting!!!!!!

On Wednesday night I am in a study with the women of our church doing Experiencing God. I am sure that many of you have done that study. If you have not, I would highly encourage you to get a couple of people together and jump into this study with both feet. I have done it at least twice in the past and wouldn't change a thing. Going through it again just reminds me of what I know and sometimes take for granted. As I go through the study, I may share with you on here what we are learning and maybe some of the quotes from the study. It is a life changing experience. I'm excited because I am in a group of women from church that I don't get to see very often and some women that I don't know. It's just wonderful.

Thirdly, our Pastor is going through the book of Joshua. AWESOME book. Of course, it's Old Testament but let me tell you, it is power. All of His word is POWER!!!! Amazing part is how I can be working or reading and it all works together. Amazing God that we serve. It is just absolutely amazing and I am just overwhelmed at how He is on EVERY page. He planned it and He wrote it!!!!!!!!

Why in the world would I do 3 at a time. IT KEEPS ME IN HIS WORD!!!!!! I love it so much. Studying His word.
Digging in His word.
Praying in His word.
TOTALLY CHANGES YOU!!!!!!

Need to get busy today. Praying that you have a wonderful day.

Laboring With You,
Doula Mama Pam